And here at home, the Bush administration continues its war on freedom. Karl Rove, George W’s top political strategist and a personal friend of mine, said that Bush will “absolutely” use his second term to push for a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage.

Well, that’s just mother-fucking-terrific, you fat piece of pedophilic shit.

"Five thousand years of human history should not be overthrown by the acts of a few liberal judges or by the acts of a few local elected officials," Rove said on NBC’s Meet the Press. "Marriage is and should be defined as being between one man and one woman." Riiiight. Because we all know that a marriage license is going to tear our society down. Yep. A motherfucking piece of parchment declaring a couple’s love is certainly going to be the beginning of the end.

So let me get this straight, you right-wing douche-bags. The statement is that it’s okay for a gay couple to live together. They can even have a “civil union” document. But a marriage? Oh, nooooo, that would be wrong. So basically, two gay people can live together, adopt kids, open up joint financial accounts, and fuck like bunnies; all of this is just morally peachy keen to you Evangelical dipshits. But a piece of paper with the M-word on it? Oh, that’ll just be the end of civilization as we know it! Mmm-hmm.

Am I the Only Person Who Sees the Fucking Problem Here? Look, look, look, I don’t care if your church has a problem with it. You can go to church on Sunday or Saturday or whatever-fucking-day you think is most holy, and bash gays all you want. That’s just swell. Lock your church doors and refuse to marry anybody you want; you reserve the right to be prejudiced bastards cowering in a pew because reality simply doesn’t fit your narrow-minded bible-centric paradigm.

I’ll be damned if I don’t fight you with my dying breath on this issue, however. You can take your Fear-of God-and-Gays hokey religious crap right the fuck out of my government. Thank you very much. Unlike our president, you see, I think this whole separation of church and state thing that our founding fathers supported was a pretty good idea.

How the fuck does a piece of paper in a gay couples house affect any part of society if you know that they are going to be sodomizing each other in there anyway? It doesn’t! Just like it doesn’t really matter what happens between them in the bedroom, I also feel it’s really none of my business what happens between them and the government. I see no, NO, NO reason to refuse a homosexual couple a marriage license.

It doesn’t even make rational fucking sense. And to make an amendment to the U.S. Constitution over it? You mean to tell me that you actually think this is an important enough issue to alter the very contract that this nation is founded on. Really. You really, really do? The highest law of the land, the document that actually protects all our freedoms should be instead altered to persecute a certain lifestyle? Hmm. Oh yeah, that’ll really make me want to put my hand to my heart and pledge allegiance.

I thought this country was all about liberty. But hey, I’m a liberal. What do I know? Oh, and while we’re altering this fine constitution of ours, let’s be sure to rewrite that part about the freedom of religion to mean that you have to choose one. No more of this secular humanism nonsense. Oh! And we should probably change that part about limiting the president to two terms. I mean, what’s going to happen in 2008??? Yeah, we really don’t need that 22nd amendment anyway…

But God save our guns! If Jesus were alive today, he’d be a Texan! YEE-HAW! I have an amendment for you, Bush: Go fuck yourself. You get this amendment through and I’ll tear it out myself. by Mark Milley

Well, I’ll give George W. Bush this: he certainly does represent the idiot majority of our population who voted his stupid ass in. Less than a week after the elections, the president ordered a major offensive on Fallujah, in what’s bound to be one of the biggest bloodbaths in recent history. This is no surprise; after all, according to Secretary of State Colin Powell, in his second term, Bush is “going to keep moving in this [aggressive] direction” in his foreign policy. No doubt about it; W really puts the RED back in ol’ Red White and Blue.